i type to you on my birthday or technically the birthday i had 20 minutes ago.
my hair is blue. very much so.
Overall i would say it was good. i got alot of happy birthdays and random cards. Looked at some puppies(im getting one in the morning) and hung out with a couple friends all day.
I got a laptop:) so ill be writing alot more.
and ill post a couple pics another day when im not so lazy.

but thats not what i really want to reveal in this small post. Ive been pretty reflective over the past two days and ive come to the conclusion that i think about the same things every single day. It's not that lifes super hard or that its picture perfect. The reality is that i live in the past. All i can think about are the wonderful blissful times i had a couple years ago. my life was perfect even if i was unaware. I guess i was to busy holding on to things that wernt there and then i woke up and faced the music. Everything was gone.. all these people who kept me afloat and everything that made me average. And i changed to accompany it. Over time these things kept building up into the things that build up this blog. And i cant be happy because i dwell on things that are out of my control. But i try...even when i know how the outcome will be.

another thing i must explain is my lack of posts...(in my opinion). truth is i have alot to say but i dont want to bitch and moan. Ironically enough i do hate complaining and i hate to be complained. so often i dont write what i want to say. blah why am i even explaining this.

happy may 9th!