kristin, or my old best friends birthday is tomarrow.
for my birthday i received a myspace comment and a no show.
i hear shes having a party.

As usual ive already built up 2 scenarios.

1. ill text her happy birthday and she will invite me to this party which i will have to decline to because a party seems like a nightmare for me right now. All those people grinding themselves on one another, dancing with boys i will never see again and once again fading until i sneak out and leave after the first hour.

2. ill text her the end.


It still hurts. She was my best friend. And now im alone. Have been alone. She wasnt the best and neither was I. but its left me broken a bit. And i hold grudges. I dont see me having a best friend or a boyfriend for the near future and it bugs me. But im back on medication and feeling a bit more "positive" so will see. Im trying really hard not to be the typical bad emo girl. but maybe i am and who cares. Afterall Im asked if its Halloween every once in a while.